


It's Hard To Rest

by TonicClaw



Series: Ichabod's Adventures [1]
Category: Sleepy Hollow (1999)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff in a Bucket, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Trans Character, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-04-04
Packaged: 2018-09-22 15:23:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9613814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonicClaw/pseuds/TonicClaw
Summary: Trans Ichabod. The Horseman. multi chapter. slow burn. stuff happens.





	1. Something Out Of a Dream

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by @amledo 's story "By Any Other Name" and it's written a lot better than this.

 Ichabod woke up in pain, a dull pain but still pain nonetheless. He rubbed his stomach and felt it cramping and he got out of bed, hoping to find his mother awake. Ichabod stepped quietly down the hallway and yelped in pain and fell to the floor. His mother came rushing from the study to kneel down and pick him up.

 

Ichabod started to cry, his mother cradled him and he asked “what is happening to me mother?” he looked at her a moment and he started to cry harder and he tightened his position in his mother's arms.

 

“My dear, these are what young ladies get when they are coming of age. You have read about this I assume?” he nodded he understood completely that he wasn't a _boy_ but a _girl_ and he waited to become a boy and his mother's magic had helped it along. He would take a drink 3 times a week and it tasted very unpleasant at times but he wanted to become a boy just as much as the drink tasted horrid.

 

He was of age to be going through puberty and he didn't like it. Ichabod had started to bleed when he went to the restroom and it scared him and his mother had to double up on the ingredients for the drink. Ichabod’s mother had shown him how to deepen his voice and how the ins-and-outs of a young male would go and he was very thankful.

 

His mother carried him into his room with some trouble but she managed. She laid him down and tucked him in and blew out the candle on the night stand. She gave him a kiss on the forehead and left, closing the door behind her. He snuggled up in the thick winter covers and fell to a blissful sleep.

 

His mother told him “you will like other men I am afraid, and you mustn't make that statement to the public, they _will_ shun you. My dear find yourself a respectively decent man and go with him, explore each other just don't let go of your feelings they are very important.” now in present day he has always kept that close to heart though, he hasn't found a “respectively decent man” to “explore” with but he has tried.

 

In Sleepy Hollow there were men, but most of them were with child, or they we not interested in men in any way. This proved very annoying for him and he hated it, though he expected it.

When Ichabod met the Horseman in The Western Woods with Katrina and Young Masbath he felt something…

 

_It wasn't hate…_

_It wasn't infatuation…_

_Well maybe a little…_

_Was it love…?_

_No...it couldn't be…_

_I love Katrina…_

_I feel wrong even thinking that…_

_Maybe I do not love Katrina but like her…_

_I will ponder later…_

 

When they gave the Horseman his head back and when he went away with The Lady Van Tassel back into whatever hell it was he felt _longing._ It was sad to think he would never be able to see him again as intriguing as he was, though he needed to stay gone if The Horseman was to keep cutting off heads.

 

One late night though, as he was due for bed he felt a presence just outside his window. Ichabod went and looked outside and saw The Horseman riding towards The Western Woods and he was, at first, weary and unsettled that he was not at rest. Ichabod had slowly gotten up and put on his coat and quietly stepped out of the house.

 

The air was cold, damp and stuffy. Ichabod had found it very hard to breathe, he had looked back to the stables and thought about getting Gunpowder but decided against it in turn to just walk. The Western Woods was void of any animal sounds or even wind and it made ichabod almost turn back but curiosity made him press on

  
_Why are you not at rest Hessian?_

 

 


	2. Stirb nicht

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!! Looooong chapter ahead. I am also bad at endings (I'm bad at endings, I suck on ice guys.) but try to enjoy the trash that is this story.

Ichabod moved slowly through the woods he stepped on quite a few branches and it was frightening to know that it was the only sound that was present. Ichabod tried to figure out why he went to the wood in the first place then he remembered 

 

_ Oh… _

 

He needed to go back. He needed to go back  _ now. _ Ichabod turned quickly on his heel and started to walk back to his home. He had no idea why he wanted to see the Hessian in the first place, he was afraid of him! He was down right terrified and he didn't want to be!

 

_ Wait a moment...want to be? _

 

Ichabod heard a snap of a twig and turned his walk to a run in a matter of 2 seconds. Though when he was running he had not heard the beats of a horse but of a person running after him.

 

_ Has the Hessian lost his horse? _

 

He kept running but he heard a crack of a gun and went down like a rock on water. Ichabod screamed and looked at his leg, he got shot in the thigh and then another crack of a gun and he felt searing pain by his shoulder. 

 

Ichabod was hyperventilating now, it hurt so bad. Ichabod fell on his back again after he heard another shot in the air and fainted.

 

**_________**

 

The Hessian was reading and sitting on his “bed” it was more like a cotton square with sheets, a few pillows and a blanket. He felt a person come into the wood and another soon after. He knew one of the men but he felt hatred in the other and he felt angry himself because he didn't want to  _ deal _ with the other man. 

 

_ Mein Gott… _

 

The Hessian sighed and got up and was about to get his steed but he felt as if he needed to walk. The air was cold and it felt lonely and he held a sense of foreboding with what was about to come. The Hessian felt it to his very core and he walked a little faster.

 

_ Crack…. _

 

The Hessian heard a oh so familiar scream but it was...of fear and  _ pain? _

 

The Hessian ran and he heard another shot but no scream...he turned a corner of sorts and found a man in a tree with a bayonet and he was peeking through a little contraption at the top of the gun. The man saw him and looked a little horrified, then he tried shooting at the Hessian and failed.

 

The Hessian threw a rock at him (because he forgot his sword) and the man fell out of the tree and the Hessian walked over to him and stabbed him with the branch he broke. 

 

_ Now...to get Ichabod. _

 

The Hessian ran and found him in a hard to see puddle of blood and his face contorted into a look of fear and sadness. 

 

The Hessian scrambled and slid on his knees and shook Ichabod as much as he could. Ichabod slowly opened his eyes and he coughed up blood and he was wheezing.

 

The Hessian said frantically and in worry between gasps of crying

 

_ Stirb Nicht..Stirb Nicht...Stirb Nicht! Oh nein, Stirb Nicht! _

 

Ichabod smiled a little, the strong stoic Hessian, crying. Ichabod held his hand and hugged him a bit. The Hessian picked Ichabod up and Ichabod bit the Hessian’s shoulder so hard the Hessian felt blood ooze out (how odd). The Hessian was confused...why was he acting this way? Towards a man nonetheless.

 

Ichabod fainted again and the Hessian walked him to the tree of the dead and it opened and a rush heat burst out. The Hessian walked inside and set Ichabod on the bed and started to take off his shirt. The bullet was so close to his heart...The Hessian didn't know how to heal Ichabod so he took his shirt off completely and put a thick piece of cloth on the wound to stop the bleeding while he worked off his pants.

 

The bullet entry in the thigh was close to his abdomen and the Hessian knew he had to invade personal space to get to the bullet…

 

_ Wunderbar…. _

 

He got the pants off with a lot of struggle and he almost cut them off with his sword but he got them off. Ichabod had moved a little and the Hessian had immediately stopped and got up, there had to be a way to do this without shaming the poor man in front of him. He had to get a few things…

 

The Hessian walked to a cabinet and got water and a few rolls of a type of gauze bandages (he knew he needed them for something) and he went back to the bed and started to take off the undergarments. The Hessian felt wrong..like he was undressing a woman without her consent and he felt disgusting.

 

The Hessian had to do this otherwise Ichabod would have an infection and have a high probability of death. He had stopped mid way when he realized, and he wasn't stupid, Ichabod was different. Very different.

 

Ichabod had screamed when the Hessian pulled his undergarments down further and he kicked him. 

 

“...m-my word! What are you doing!?”

 

The Hessian looked down to the floor, he had a slight suspicion about who Ichabod was, now he figured it out…the Hessian said in a calm amazement:

 

_ “ _ Du bist eine Frau?”

 

Ichabod yanked up his undergarments and closed his eyes and tucked his knees to his face. The Hessian got up and sat next to Ichabod and said

 

“Es ist ok..”

“Es ist ok, ich werde dich nicht verletzen”

 

Ichabod started to cry, he was scared and upset. The Hessian heard him sniffle and he felt bad..

 

_ Was? Warum fühle ich mich so schlecht?... _

 

Ichabod slowly put his legs on the bed and he felt so embarrassed. The Hessian looked away when he did.

 

“Verzeih mir bitte…”

 

Ichabod had heard those words before...he had halfway forgotten what they meant. The tone was sad and full of regret so he had guessed it was an apology…

 

He cleared his throat and the Hessian looked up and Ichabod patted the spot next to him. The Hessian got up slowly and sat next to him. Ichabod felt the feminine side of him take over and he cupped the Hessian’s cheek.

 

The Hessian’s eyes widened and Ichabod’s softened, he smiled and the Hessian slowly raised his hand to hold Ichabod's. Ichabod then asked:

 

_ Do you understand me?  _

 

The Hessian slowly nodded, he understood for the most part though some words went over his head. The Hessian asked:

 

_ Kann Ich? _

 

Ichabod spoke a little German, the basic stuff and he responded with:

 

_ Sie Können  _

 

The Hessian smiled and his teeth had made a brief appearance and he grabbed Ichabod's face and kissed him. Ichabod's eyes had widened and then he closed them. He thought:

 

_ What am I doing? I do not know but I have no care. _

 

His chest was tight and he needed to stop (his body hurt). He tapped the Hessian's shoulder and he stopped. The Hessian looked at Ichabod's body…

 

His chest was covered in blood and his thigh was bruised and sticky with dried blood. The Hessian got up and got the water and a rag and dabbed the wet cloth on Ichabod's thigh, shoulder and arm. Ichabod tried not to scream but he let out some every now and again and he started to cry when the Hessian had tried to take out the bullets with his sword.

  
  


The Hessian got the last bullet out and Ichabod sat there wiping his tears on his arm after a bit. The Hessian sat there in thought.

 

_ Warum mag ich sie? ihm? ihr? Ich verstehe nicht… _

 

Ichabod saw that the Hessian was deep in thought and snapped his fingers in front of his face and said:

 

“Hessian...it is fine I know you are confused, I would be as well. Alas, you know I have to take my leave soon...Young Masbath would be terrified if I did not go back to New York...I am sorry…”

 

The Hessian looked a little alarmed because halfway through speaking Ichabod’s voice had lightened and took a more feminine tone. 

 

He looked at Ichabod and his face perked up in inspiration and he announced:

 

_ Ich kann mit dir nach New York fahren! _

 

Ichabod broke what he could out of that sentence and he finally got it and then frowned…

 

“You cannot..go with me...your spirit is tied here and then you would need to learn English and learn-”

 

The Hessian cut him off when he figured out that he couldn't go with Ichabod…

 

“Hessian?...”

“Mm?”

“What is this?”

“Was?”

“Forgive me but what are we now?”

“...ich..”

“You do not know do you?”

“Nein…”

“Oh...well if we could find...a..way to..-”

 

The Hessian’s face lit up and then lost everything when he closed his eyes and fell back on the floor.

 

“Hessian!” 

 

Ichabod tumbled off the bed and he landed on his shoulder and screamed in pain and blacked out…

 

_ __________ _

 

_ I woke up in a dim room not like my own and I felt around for Ichabod but did not find them. I yelled out for them but I did not hear anything.. _

 

_ I got up on my feet and walked around and saw a door and I jogged to it hoping I could find out where I was. I opened the door and saw only light and I stepped in and the light cleared to reveal an angel. _

 

_ Wer bist du? _

 

**_Hello Dedrick._ **

 

_ What? Who- _

 

**_Yes yes thank me for you speaking English_ **

 

_...why am I here? _

 

**_We are giving you another chance young soldier_ **

 

_ Another chance? _

 

**_Yes. With the transgender lady. Formerly Isabella now Ichabod._ **

 

_ Why? I hate questioning but why? Did I do something right? _

 

**_Yes actually, you saved Ichabod from death, you patched him up and you accepted him for who he was, you did not judge._ **

 

_ … _

 

**_So we will give you another chance, you will learn English from me in 3 days time and you will become human again but, on one condition…_ **

 

_ What would that be? _

 

**_Leave your sword and horse. That is all we ask, your horse will be safe in the stables up in heaven. Will you accept?_ **

 

_ ….Yes. _

 

**_Good now come, and when you come to, do not inhale. Ok?_ **

 

_ Ok. _

 

_ I saw the angel beacon me to a type of water hole and they guided me up and I stepped in and I felt different. The angel encouraged me to submerge myself and I flipped myself over and waved. They waved and I closed my eyes and I felt nothing. _

 

_ _____________ _

 

Ichabod had woken up sometime around midnight and saw the tree was open and he looked around and saw the Hessian’s cloak and he grabbed it and he slowly walked out. It was cool and he heard shuffling of dirt and he felt scared, she started to tread back and he heard a great gasp coming from the west side of the tree.

 

He froze and he heard coughing and hacking and he cringed and he clipped the cloak together and “jogged” over to the side of the tree the noise was on.

 

He saw the Hessian covering his mouth with his sleeve and dusting off his pants with the other hand. Ichabod’s face brightened and he took slow strides to him. 

“Hessian!”

“Ichabod!” 

The Hessian ran to him and held him up (because he was going to fall) he heard Ichabod groan and they sat on the wet leaves.

 

“What happened to you?”

“I do not…!”

“Hessian! You are speaking English! How?”

“The angel let me have a chance again...I can go to New York with you now!”

“My god that is the best news!...Shall we?”

“Wai- Wait...you need to rest first.”

“Ok Hessian...can we go in now?”

“We can”

  
With that the Hessian and Ichabod went inside the tree, and when they got inside they laid down on the Hessians bed. Ichabod snuggled as close as he could to the Hessian and the Hessian wrapped his arm around ichabod.

"Hessian?"

"Hm?"

"I...I...-"

"Ich liebe dich auch"

 

They fell asleep after the Hessian cleaned Ichabod up again.

They next morning the Hessian went into town and everyone hid and tried shooting at him but he did nothing but get ichabods things. They saw him leave with things and they were afraid that he had gotten the Constable and they were right...to an extent.

they packed their things and headed to New York; it was a long walk that took quite a few days the Hessian carried Ichabod most of the way. He thought it would have gone faster with his horse but the horses responsibility was done and he had left his sword (but brought the axe) and he felt...was it happiness?..relief? The Hessian was confused.

 

When they got to New York, the Hessian had trimmed his hair but kept his sharp teeth, much to ichabods dismay. Young Masbath was frightened at first but eventually got used to the Hessian. The Hessian renamed himself sort of; Dedrick, it fit.

He got a job, torture chamber, that fit too. Everyone was again, scared of him. He liked it that way even though some had a hard time understanding him since his accent was still there.

He, Ichabod and Masbath lived peacefully in the same apartment and it was all the Hessian would have asked for.


End file.
